herewearenowentertain.us

And so my luck with official ID photos stops with not a bang, but a simper.

Apologies to those who have seen this on the good book already, but I’m building a brand here, folks.

youareanobject:

They’ll ask you if you can ‘score some weed’. You’ll look at them with sort of a confused smile, then you’ll remember that you can, so you’ll say yeah. They’ll say cool and ask how much and if they should…follow you? Wait here? S’up to you, bro. You’ll say it’s at your house. You mean, your apartment and laugh and they laugh too and say it’s cool and they follow you back there. They wait in your place as you get the pot from your neighbor, you go back in and they have a dutch, so one of them rolls a blunt. The one nearest to you tells a funny story about how he almost lost his job because he said the word ‘reneged’ and a customer confused it for a racial slur. One of them smells good—the one closest to you. He’s wearing the hat. You do that thing when you stare at a guy’s forearms. His are tanned kind of golden and you involuntarily lick your lips (it’s something a lot of people do—the lips thing—even if they don’t notice it) then you notice that the room smells like pot.

The guys get stoned, you do too, but they seem like pros and you’re kinda lightweight. They start talking about stupid shit (like conspiracies, and elementary arguments that they think are ‘mad deep’ but that really make them seem like stoners) and you spend the rest of the time wondering what they look like with the rest of their clothes off, if they’re affectionate, if they are fatherly, motherly; if they would be there for you if you fucked up really bad, or said something you didn’t mean but needed to get out of you mind; if they would push you to be your best and understand when you were afraid, show you why you shouldn’t be. This is when you realize how lonely you are, and have been. But there are people here! You sigh and let them talk as you basically wait for them to leave. When they are gone you can finally enjoy their presence.

brb, gotta go kill myself.

Socially Awesome Penguin | Meme Generator

*hysterical, relieved laughter that goes on and on well past the point where listeners become uncomfortable*

I don’t really know what regulatory body handles violations of Rule 34, so I figured I’d report directly to the tumblr community and someone would surely take care of it. Despite the pure sex that is those two up there, Damon Bennet and Mike Holmes, Jr, there is no Holmes on Homes slash fiction, you guys! Somebody get on that. And remember: Make It Right™.